21 November, 2005

Top 10 Excuses for Not Going to Church

I received this in an e-mail and thought it was worthy of sharing. It is funny, but at the same time... so sadly true, as these are the real reasons people give for not attending church.

Top Ten Excuses For Avoiding Church Services

Many people have an excuse for not attending church services each week.
If you were to take those excuses and apply them to other things we do (for example -- eating), those excuses might look like this:

10. I was forced to eat as a child.

9. People who eat all the time are hypocrites; they aren't really hungry.

8. There are so many different kinds of food, I can't decide what to eat.

7. I used to eat, but I got bored and stopped.

6. I only eat on special occasions, like Christmas and Easter.

5. None of my friends will eat with me.

4. I'll start eating when I get older.

3. I don't really have time to eat.

2. I don't believe that eating does anybody any good. It's just a crutch.

and the # 1 excuse for not eating.......

1. Restaurants and grocery stores are only after your money.


Anonymous said...


rackerman5@excite.com said...

May I use this, with proper credit of course, in my article for my church newsletter??

Darrell said...

This is not an original. This was received in an Email with no citation of who authored it.

ExcuseGal said...

Although these "excuses" are really just a thinly veiled commentary on people who seem to have better things to do on Sunday than attend church, I have two real excuses for not attending church:

Forbidden Fruit: "Something I ate for breakfast must have been expired because my stomach feels awful. I don’t think I should go to church because I might throw up in front of everybody."

Omni-Directional Worship: "Since God is omnipresent, I’m going to spend 90 minutes worshiping him from home instead of going to church this morning."

I actually shot a whole video clip with all my various excuses for skipping church, which you can see here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DlrCYOpHy3s

David Santiago said...

Here is one of the best excuses.
"I don't want to be married to the church".

Anonymous said...

The "people at church are hypocrites" is the most common excuse. lol, Matthew chp 5 is all I'm saying.